The Warm Glow of Success and Empathy
The Warm Glow of Success ...
By W. Owen Thornton
Human kindness needs to be practiced regularly and top-most in our daily actions. Here are two things to remember when promoting kindness in the world around you.
#1. Continually practice acts of kindness. In 1972, Isen and Leven studied the effects of what would happen to someone if they randomly did or didn't find a dime in a phone booth. Really, just finding a dime in phone booth makes people kinder? (well it's 50 cents today, I guess.) In the study people did or didn't find a dime in the coin return slot. When they turned around a co-conspirator of the test dropped papers in front of them. Of the 14 who found the dime, 12 stopped to help. Of the 25 who did not find a dime, only 1 stopped to help. Acts of kindness, like opening doors and helping others who are short change at parking meters need to be regular occurances of you hope to make the world a kinder place around you.
#2. Take a deep breath upon your initial reaction and then lead with empathy. In a workplace an employee with a bad back was standing at her desk. She could work this way in comfort, but NOT while sitting down. I get the boss's response to this "standing at the desk" act. They responded negatively because the boss had a vision of what was right ... and what was right is that people sit when they work. And so, the thoughtful, back-hurting employee was chastised for standing. The response produced an unfortunate moment in the workplace. The employee thought they were being clever and dedicated to their employer and was instead made to feel bad for being productive. Later when the employee had a chance to explain, the boss apologized. The better response? Ask why the employee is standing. It could have been that the chair was uncomfortable. Or, better yet, because the boss takes time to get to know their employees just a little, (through little human kindness moments once a week) s/he already knew that the employee suffers from a bad back from time-to-time and could have asked, "Back acting up again? Is there anything I can do to help? Are you all right to work like that?"
Human kindness takes such little effort and yeilds such large rewards. It's often not the salary we pay people that keeps them happy ... if we're within range employers are usually seen as reasonable ... it's being treated as a human being (again within reason) that goes a long way in making a happy, dedicated employee.
By W. Owen Thornton
Human kindness needs to be practiced regularly and top-most in our daily actions. Here are two things to remember when promoting kindness in the world around you.
#1. Continually practice acts of kindness. In 1972, Isen and Leven studied the effects of what would happen to someone if they randomly did or didn't find a dime in a phone booth. Really, just finding a dime in phone booth makes people kinder? (well it's 50 cents today, I guess.) In the study people did or didn't find a dime in the coin return slot. When they turned around a co-conspirator of the test dropped papers in front of them. Of the 14 who found the dime, 12 stopped to help. Of the 25 who did not find a dime, only 1 stopped to help. Acts of kindness, like opening doors and helping others who are short change at parking meters need to be regular occurances of you hope to make the world a kinder place around you.
#2. Take a deep breath upon your initial reaction and then lead with empathy. In a workplace an employee with a bad back was standing at her desk. She could work this way in comfort, but NOT while sitting down. I get the boss's response to this "standing at the desk" act. They responded negatively because the boss had a vision of what was right ... and what was right is that people sit when they work. And so, the thoughtful, back-hurting employee was chastised for standing. The response produced an unfortunate moment in the workplace. The employee thought they were being clever and dedicated to their employer and was instead made to feel bad for being productive. Later when the employee had a chance to explain, the boss apologized. The better response? Ask why the employee is standing. It could have been that the chair was uncomfortable. Or, better yet, because the boss takes time to get to know their employees just a little, (through little human kindness moments once a week) s/he already knew that the employee suffers from a bad back from time-to-time and could have asked, "Back acting up again? Is there anything I can do to help? Are you all right to work like that?"
Human kindness takes such little effort and yeilds such large rewards. It's often not the salary we pay people that keeps them happy ... if we're within range employers are usually seen as reasonable ... it's being treated as a human being (again within reason) that goes a long way in making a happy, dedicated employee.
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